we still remember mitch hedberg

A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.

Archive for April, 2003

Apr 27th 2003

who’s laundering money, harry?

an article in last december’s blood-horse magazine reported on harry reid’s efforts to outlaw internet wagering, a ban he seeks because of his fears that the web is prone to be used as a vehicle for laundering money. reid’s home state of nevada has been washing the money of italian gangsters for years, and […]

Apr 24th 2003

did you ever notice…

passionate protests in iraq involve people cutting themselves. passionate protests in america (and other western nations) involve people getting naked.

Apr 23rd 2003

the red hot valentines

the red hot valentines are a band from champaign, illinois. i vigorously recommend the tune, “bring back the good times.”

Apr 23rd 2003

laughing a little too hard

Over the recent months I have wondered if we as Americans have become too silly. While humor certainly has a place in relieving the palpable tension of war and helping reduce stress; like all virtues, its overabundance is a vice.
I am, as much as anybody, guilty of overindulgence in the sarcastic and silly. […]

Apr 19th 2003

and we have a winner

Winner of all-encompassingly’s inaugural Billy Packer “Assert the Painfully Obvious” Award goes to Iran’s Oil Minister, Bijan Namadar Zanghaneh. When commenting on the possibility of Iraq leaving OPEC (the oil cartel) and ridding itself of the onerous export quotas imposed on member countries, Zanghaneh made the following erudite observation:
“…the long-term interests of other OPEC […]

Apr 19th 2003

the Arab world must industrialize

A thought provoking article appeared today on Arab News, “the Middle East’s Leading English Daily,” regarding the necessity of industrialization of the Arab world. In part is said:

Attaining economic freedom is the first step toward self-reliance. I find it extremely odd that a country such as Saudi Arabia, which is blessed with huge oil […]

Apr 19th 2003

if the communist party of China could only get SARS…

Over the past several weeks the increasing number of SARS cases has received considerable attention. It is now known that SARS originated in China and that the communist regime (which is as overdue for a regime change as any in the world) purposely hid the seriousness of the illness, as well as the number […]

Apr 19th 2003

weddings are crazy

i wish i could avoid all weddings. there is too much formality and sentimentality and schedule-keeping involved in weddings and whatnot. the depressing thought (for me) is that very few of my friends are married, and most of them, if not all, will eventually get married. i am doomed to be a […]

Apr 16th 2003

clinton criticizes US foreign policy: says love is the answer

on tuesday, former president bill clinton blasted US foreign policy.
“Our paradigm now seems to be: something terrible happened to us on September 11, and that gives us the right to interpret all future events in a way that everyone else in the world must agree with us,” said Clinton, who spoke at a seminar of […]

Apr 14th 2003

just when you thought it was safe to take out the trash…

it wasn’t . (click to read about the attack of the killer ‘yardys’)

cedar rapids has always been a puzzling place to me. they actually claim to have five seasons instead of four (the fifth lasts all year and is called ‘a time to enjoy’). but this problem they have now with belligerent […]