all-encompassingly

we still remember mitch hedberg

A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.

Nov 27th 2006

Mild Hurricane Season, Global Warming to Blame

This year has given us the mildest hurricane season since 1997.

With cataclysmic predictions that hurricanes would swarm from the tropics like termites, no one thought 2006 would be the most tranquil season in a decade.

Barring a last-second surprise from the tropics, the season will end Thursday with nine named storms, and only five of those hurricanes. This year is the first season since 1997 that only one storm nudged its way into the Gulf of Mexico.

Obviously global warming is to blame for this inconvenient truth.

25 Responses to “Mild Hurricane Season, Global Warming to Blame”

  1. Doug,

    actually the mild hurricane season was caused by El Nino, and not global warming. Check your info.

  2. doug

    Dan,

    Let me give you the 4-1-1 on the blog so that your stay will prove less frustrating and more enjoyable:

    Occasionally Travis and I condiment our right-wing rantings with pinches of irony and generous helpings of sarcasm.

  3. *shakes head*

    I actually caught your sarcasm. I just love rubbing it in that you were wrong. 😉

  4. Bill

    Last year, the worst season on record was blamed on global warming. Now you’re claiming the mild season is due to global warming. Which is it? None of the above.
    Global warming is based on junk science, and the ranting of moonbats like Al Gore.

  5. doug

    I actually caught your sarcasm. I just love rubbing it in that you were wrong.

    Ummmm…yeah…

    Dan, here’s the 4-1-1 on sarcasm.

    I know that both you and Steve claim to understand sarcasm, but your comments here (and his elsewhere) say otherwise.

    I can only imagine that this isn’t the first time that not understanding sarcasm has caused an awkward social situation for you.

    Dan walks into an important meeting at work 15 minutes late.

    Boss: Dan, so good to see you here on time.

    Dan: Thank you, but I am actually 15 minutes late.

    Boss: I know, I’m being sarcastic. Get here on time for the next meeting. Ok?

    Dan: I actually caught your sarcasm. I just love rubbing it in that you were wrong. Sucka!

    There is a brief silence as his co-workers begin to appreciate Dan’s comment earlier that day during lunch:

    “I don’t know what you guys are talking about, The Office is the most boring, un-funny show ever!”

  6. Oh wow. That is hilarious. 😀

    Actually laughing out loud here…

  7. steve

    Give me a break Doug. Your sarcasm was a dig at the theory of global warming. Dan called you on it and then you say your words weren’t really an indictment of the idea (fact) of global warming. When your sarcasm is off base don’t expect us to read your mind.

    As Ryan says. Hilarious!

  8. steve

    Bill,

    I’d love to see why you consider 4 out of 5 scientists “moonbats”. I think you need to do some fact checking. The debate is over in the scientific community.

  9. doug

    Steve,

    Again, here’s the 4-1-1 on sarcasm.

    From the page on sarcasm (I even took my “Dan example” from here):

    A form of irony in which apparent praise conceals another, scornful meaning. For example, a sarcastic remark directed at a person who consistently arrives fifteen minutes late for appointments might be, “Oh, you’ve arrived exactly on time!”

    So, I post:

    Mild Hurricane Season, Global Warming to Blame

    Just as the person is not actually on time to the appointment, global warming is not the cause of a mild hurricane season. Duh! That’s the point!! That is what sarcasm is!!!

    C’mon guys, Bill Maher uses sarcasm all the time. He’s hilarious. And he’s liberal. I know it’s possible for you to get these jokes!

  10. steve

    You were still trying to use your post to ridicule global warming. Duh! You were wrong.

  11. steve

    Doug,

    What do you take us for? Idiots?

    The purpose of your statement was to discredit global warming with the irony (thus sarcasm) that the hurricane season was relatively calm this year. We get it! It’s funny how you twist things around to say that’s not the sarcasm you intended. Everyone who reads this and sees your little play on the words “inconvenient truth” clearly understands your sarcasm. Only moonbat, I mean hee haw, I mean Bill sits there agrees with your explanation of your sarcasm.

    I understand why you flip flop though. It’s more difficult to hit a moving target.

  12. The website for the film “An Inconvenient Truth” prominently features a hurricane on the movie poster.

    On this page it is listed as the first “scientific evidence” of global warming.

    Despite the fact that actual hurricane experts caution us from attaching global warming to the recent spat of strong storms, global warming proponents continue to beat this war drum.

    While it is clear that discussion is occuring regarding the role global warming might play, that is what it is. Discussion. Not conclusion.

    So when those attaching global warming to strong hurricanes claim that it is proven fact, they simply encourage sarcastic blog posts.

    🙂

  13. doug

    Ryan,

    Thank you. At least someone understands my humor.

  14. steve

    Ryan,

    We all understand that the jury is still out about the connection of the increased intensity of hurricanes and global warming. However, think for a moment about the amount of energy in a one degree celsius increase in ocean temperature. Do the math (1 calorie to increase 1 gram of water 1 degree celsius). Simple dimensional analysis. That alone should cause a reasonable person to at least be open to the idea that there could be a connection.

    Oh I know what you guys will say. Melting polar ice caps will keep the ocean temperature in check right?

  15. Oh I know what you guys will say. Melting polar ice caps will keep the ocean temperature in check right?

    No, I will use your own words:

    We all understand that the jury is still out about the connection of the increased intensity of hurricanes and global warming.

    And on a related side note, you guys are hard to have a conversation with.
    Dan
    Steve

  16. doug

    No, I will use your own words

    Oh, snap!

  17. Steve

    Oh Snap what? I’ll be the first to admit that the connection with hurricanes is still debated. That doesn’t mean that global warming isn’t occuring. Really Doug you’re like John Stewart’s impersonation of Bush. “Good question me. That oughta shut me up”.

    Obviously the joke about the polar ice caps went over your head Doug and Ryan. Let me dumb it down for you. Melting ice in a pool of water keeping it cool. Ring a bell. Look at your soda pop next time for a clue.

  18. Steve

    And Ryan,

    You really do like to cherry pick discussions don’t you (kind of like Cheney cherry picking the intelligence). Look what Doug said first.

    “Name three countries where this is true.(where Muslims have peacefully coexisted over with people of other religions)

    I can’t think of one, aside from the United States, where there is any sizable Muslim population and there aren’t serious problems with that population.”

    Later he recognized his mistake and not wanting to be labeled a bigot he qualified his statement.

    Those actions certainly are questionable if not confusing.

  19. Steve

    Ryan,

    Still awaiting those calculations. Maybe to interest you more you can compare the value to megatons (TNT, a language you warmongers are more familiar with).

  20. doug

    Oh Snap what?

    Oh, snap…you got your argument handed to you.

    I’ll be the first to admit that the connection with hurricanes is still debated.

    Of course. Who would think that you or others believe such a thing?

    I mean, you’re the “first to admit” that the “connection with hurricanes is still debated”. Yet, if I had a brain then I would see that ferocious hurricanes might kind of be caused by global warming…at least that is what “reasonable people” think when they actually take the time and “do the math” while applying “simple dimensional analysis”.

  21. doug

    Later he recognized his mistake and not wanting to be labeled a bigot he qualified his statement.

    I added my additional comment in the (vain) hope that you were mature enough to not use “bigotry” as a argument crutch. Oh well…doug’s law (shamelessly stolen from Godwin) still stands:

    As an online discussion with a liberal grows longer, the probability of said liberal accusing someone else of being a bigot approaches one.

  22. Steve

    Wrong Doug. How was my argument handed to me? I’m the one that said from the get go that nobody knows for sure about hurricanes and global warming. All I’ve said is that the idea warrants further study based on the simple math that you geniuses refuse to consider. You really do need to develop reading comprehension skills. Has nothing to do with whether or not we are contributing to global warming. It is occuring. You guys are wrong on this one.

    And I had hoped you would be mature enough not to make sweeping generalizations about Islam. I guess we’re even.

  23. doug

    Steve,

    You got pwned. I should have just let Ryan’s comment stand.

    Comments are closed.

  24. […] i blame global warming….or maybe el niño (spanish for “the niño”): […]

  25. […] Steve, Nov 2006 [link] […]